Murphy's Law –

... rewritten from the Ferret Mailing List,

STAR FERRETS

1.  If it can be moved, it will be stashed. If it can't be moved, a stash will be established inside or   underneath it.

 2.  If it moves be itself, it must be a toy.

 3.  The best toys are the things you don't want them to play with.

 4.  If it is edible, it will be stashed. If it is not edible, it will be eaten.

 5.  All plants need repotting even if they don't.

 6.  If there is no way to get back out, it will be gotten into.

 7.  The newer or more expensive the carpet, the sooner it will be shredded.

 8.  The more you need something the more likely it is to be missing, especially if you are already running late.

 9.  The higher it is, the more fun it is to jump off of it. More so if there is an audience.

 10. The best food is always in somebody else's dish.

 11. There is always a corner somewhere that you never considered, and you will not find it until after your company does.

 12. "Ferret-Proof” really isn't ...

 13. Saying, "absolutely no more ferrets!" is guaranteed to bring another one into the house.

Carla and the Wooziemaniacs

April 29, 1996öCarla Smith

The Ten Commandments

Author unknown

... as published by the United Ferret Organization

1. Thou shalt covet all corners. Thou shalt not use kitty liter for it is a heathern CAT thing, and thusly, you shalt    scatter the heathern thing everywhere.
 2. Thou shalt bite thy brethren. Thou shalt lick thy humans, except that thou shalt slip in the occasional nip to  ensure that they do not become too complacent.
 3. Thou shalt revere milk and ice cream above all things, except for Linatone, which is heaven sent.
 4. Thou shalt despise anything that is labeled "For Ferrets".
 5. Thou shalt climb everything in sight and take the good stuff.
 6. When placed in a cage, or locked in a room or out of a room, thou shalt beat loudly upon the door in violent protest.
 7. Thou shalt lurk, and seek every opportunity.
 8. Thou shalt love and honor shoes, socks, and above all else, toes.
 9. Thou shalt expose the roots of all plants. Let none escape your wrath.

 10. Thou shalt hide from sight those things most coveted by humans, that they shall never more see the light of day.